Saturday, April 9, 2011

It is not power but disaster


Anger, what’s that??

I’m not gonna give an academic definition, but anger is, to my personal experience, an irrational state mind and body that can make unpredictable things to the extent, you wanna kill someone! That is anger all right.

Anger is the feeling of “I am right” and “Others are wrong”. You will go off doing what you think is right without considering the opinion of others. You will do anything to convince people that you are right. To some degree, you will use the extraordinary words you don’t usually use during this state what I call “The state of stupidity”. Extraordinary words as in curse words. Yikes!

Your whole facial expression will change, from white to red. You will experience your blood pressure rising and you feel hot, literally hot. You will most probably sweat. You will feel like if you had the chance, you could just tear the skin from the flesh of the person you’re mad at with. Ouch.

Your unconscious mind will take over your body and you be like “Am I doing this”, “is this me” and “what am I doing?”. Now you tell me, have you had this similar experience before?
You will literally forget who you are when you are in rage. Literally forget just like that. The solely goal you want to achieve is to get rid of the subject of your anger.

I’ll share you my experience just recently (Real experience). I had an argument with my sahabah I’ve known him for quite a time. But I was so pissed off, I really said to him this “If you say one more word, I’ll kill you!”. Eventually, one more word came out from his mouth, I was overwhelmed! I got up and really wanted to smash his head off. But less than a split second, I pulled back my swinging hand. I didn’t hit him. I didn’t know why. Until now I regard that as a mystery.

Devils are laughing!
Remember back how it is when you’re contempt.  When you are letting yourself go and letting rage taking over your body, this is when devil will laugh like mad you know. They have managed to suppress down your Iman and trigger your anger. Anger is from Devil as the hadith goes:

Narrated Atiyyah as-Sa’di:
Abu Wa’il al-Qass said: We entered upon Urwah ibn Muhammad ibn as-Sa’di. A man spoke to him and made him angry. So he stood and performed ablution; he then returned and performed ablution, and said: My father told me on the authority of my grandfather Atiyyah who reported the Apostle of Allah (peace_be_upon_him) as saying: Anger comes from the devil, the devil was created of fire, and fire is extinguished only with water; so when one of you becomes angry, he should perform ablution. (Dawud :: Book 41 : Hadith 4766)

The last time I was overcome by rage, you know what my other Sahabah said to me after I got better, “Ameen, your face was really like Syaitan!” Astaghfirullah! (This is true, not made up ok). What he meant was not me growing two horns or my ears when pointy edged or my eyebrows grew thicker, no not that type of Syaitan. But my face turned red, my voice was so loud, the words I choose to say was like “You %$@*!!” (Horrible).

You know, if I recorded that video of me and I play it back, I will definitely feel stupid. Yeah, stupid. How can I, a Muslim, let anger control myself? How can I, a Mukmin let Devil possess my soul? This is not what the prophet showed to me. This is not what Allah asked me to do. No, no.

When you’re in “The state of stupidity”

Maybe these are the things that can help you when you’re in the “The state of stupidity”. These things can help you if you help yourself (If you know what I mean). But if you want anger possess your soul, then so be it, its your choice then. But I would advise you to take these precautious measures seriously:

1 – Seek refuge with Allah from the Devil:
Sulayman bin Sard narrated:
“I was sitting with the Prophet, when two men began slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet said: ”I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said: “I seek refuge with Allah from the Devil,” what he feels would go away.’”
['Fath al-Bari'; 6/337]

2 – Remain silent:
The Messenger of Allah said:
“If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent.”
['Sahih al-Jami'; # 693]

3 – Sit down or lie down:
“Abu Dharr was taking his camels to drink at a trough that he owned, when some other people came along and said to one another: “Who can compete with Abu Dharr in bringing animals to drink and make his hair stand on end?” A man said: “I can.” So, he brought his animals and competed with Abu Dharr and ended up breaking the trough.Abu Dharr was standing when he saw this, so, he sat down, then he laid down. Someone asked him: “O Abu Dharr, why did you sit down then lie down?” He said: “The Messenger of Allah said: ”If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so that his anger will go away. If iit does not go away, let him lie down.”"” [Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad (5/152) and 'Sahih al-Jami' (694)]

Al-Imam al-Khattabi said: “One who is standing is in a position to strike and destroy, while the one who is sitting is less likely to do that, and the one who is lying down can do neither. It is possible that the Prophet told the angry person to sit down or lie down so that he would not do something that he would later regret and Allah Knows best.” ['Ma'alim as-Sunan'; 5/141]

4 – Smile:

Anas bin Malik narrated:
“I was walking with the Messenger of Allah, and he was wearing a Najrani cloak with a rough collar. A bedouin came and seized him roughly by the edge of his cloak, and I saw the marks left on his neck by the collar. Then the bedouin ordered him to give him some of the wealth of Allah that he had. The Prophet turned to him and smiled, then ordered that he should be given something.” ['Fath al-Bari'; 10/375]
5 – Remember the advice of the Prophet:

Abu Hurayrah narrated:
“A man said to the Prophet: “Advise me.” He said: ”Do not become angry.” The man repeated his request several times, and each time the Prophet said to him: ”Do not become angry.”" ['Fath al-Bari'; 10/456]
According to another narration, the man later said: “I thought about what the Prophet said, and I realized that anger combines all kinds of evil.” [Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad; 5/373]

6 – Remember the high status of those who control themselves:
The Messenger of Allah said:
“The strong man is not the one who can overpower others. Rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry.” [Reported in the 'Musnad' of Ahmad; 2/236, and it is authentic]

7 – Rewards for those who control their anger:
The Messenger of Allah said:
“Do not become angry, and Paradise is yours.” ['Sahih al-Jami'; # 7374]

8 – Remember that resisting anger is one of the signs of righteousness:
“And march forth in the way to forgiveness from your Lord, and for a Paradise as wide as the heavens and the earth, prepared for the righteous; those who spend in prosperity and in adversity, repress anger, and pardon men. Verily, Allah loves the good-doers.” [Al 'Imran; 134]

Conclusion: Anger is disaster!

Now I’ve come to the conclusion is that Anger is disaster! I was fooled by people who act cool but actually are fools. Anger is not power.  Anger only gives adverse effects and no good effects:
‘Alqamah bin Wa’il narrated:
“My father said to me: “I was sitting with the Prophet, when a man came to him leading another man by a rope. He said: “O Messenger of Allah, this man killed my brother.” The Messenger of Allah asked him, ”Did you kill him?” He said: “Yes, I killed him.” He asked:”How did you kill him?” He said: “He and I were hitting a tree to make the leaves fall for animal feed, and then he insulted me, so I struck him on the side of the head with an axe and killed him.”"
['Sahih Muslim'; # 1307]

Alhamudlillah, until now I haven’t killed anybody… Yet…
Well my last advice for you is, don’t you feel you’re are superior and powerful in rage because you’re just showing your weakness in this “State of stupidity”. The prophet once said:
Abu Huraira reported: I heard Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) as saying: One is not strong because of one’s wrestling skillfully. They said: Allah’s Messenger, then who is strong? He said: He who controls his anger when he is in a fit of rage. (Muslim :: Book 32 : Hadith 6314)

You will not look lame if you choose to erase your anger. You will not look weak but you are a strong one.

Even if you are in anger because of justice, there is still a better way of doing things right?
The reason why I pulled back my swinging hand in a spilt-second decision was because my Iman gained back possession. Huh. Or not it’s gonna be a fight to death then!

So, anger is not power but anger is disaster!


p/s: alif lam sod ba ro.. :)

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